Growing up, whenever I lost Barbie’s shoe or my favorite stuffed animal, my mom would tell me to pray to St. Anthony, patron saint of lost things. It never helped much (stupid St. Anthony...) but now I've learned of a way cooler saint—St. Anthony the Abbot, patron saint of bacon! Paintings portraying Anthony often showed him accompanied by a pig and so, those working with pigs took him as their patron saint. I take him as my spiritual guide. You can get your very own St. Anthony figurine, complete with bacon in frying pan and a prayer to assist you in the enjoyment of bacon:
O wonderous St. Anthony, please bless me with an abundance of quality bacon and grant me the patience and timing to properly fry each glorious strip. Amen.